Drunk Maka
by xXBlackBloodAngelXx
Summary: Soul has to deal with a drunk Maka. May include later one-shots. This is Pugpie15 I just changed my pen name
1. Drunk Maka

**DISCLAIMER: I no own Soul Eater**

****"Maka, Maka, Where have you been. It's 3AM."

"sorry me no Maka. Me no know Soul."

"But I never told you my name. If you don't know me then how do you know my name."

"The magical penguin pony unicorns in the trees told me."

"Wha the-"

"DO YOU NOT BELIEVE IN THE MAGICAL PENGUIN PONY UNICORNS!"

"No not- wait a second maka why do you have a knife."

"whoever doesn't believe deserve to die."

"WAIT MAKA I BELIEVE."

"that's what I thought. Don't you think all cats deserve to die."

"Are you drunk."

"psh no."

"I think you should shut up"*kisses Soul*

_~One makeout scene later~_

"Wait a second you don't taste like alcohol."

"Just go with the flow, mon *Jamaican accent*

"MAKA"

"Oh just shut up and kiss me, cool guys kiss people don't they Soul"

"Oh yeah cool guys always kiss girls."

*_another makeout session_*

**what did you think please review**


	2. Drink or Dare

**This is for a request I got from Deathwriter42. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own soul eater, but if I did there would be pugs everywhere. And no I do not have problems.**

It was just another ordinary night where everyone was at Death Gallows. Maka, Soul, Blackstar, Tsubaki, Kid, Liz, and Patty had been laying around watching movies, but everyone was so bored they couldn't Concentrate on the T.V.

Finally Maka had enough, "That's enough. This is so boring and everyone here knows it. I have an idea. Liz, go get all the alcohol you can find, We're going to play extreme truth or dare." "What's extreme truth or dare?" The timid Tsubaki asked. "It's basically truth or dare with extremely embarrassing dares and questions. That and every time you pick dare you have to take a shot. This isn't exactly a game for lightweights." "And what exactly would you know about alcohol Maska?" Soul asked sarcastically. "There's lots of things you don't know about me, _Soully_." Maka replied licked her lips slowly. Soul's face turned beat red.

Everyone gathered in a circle on the floor with lots of alcohol around them. Blackstar went first so he wouldn't throw a fit about being godly. "Let's see...Maka, since it was your idea truth or dare?" Right away Maka replied With "Dare!" and took a shot of vodka. Straight. "You know you could've mixed it right Maka?" Kid asked. " Yeah, but that ruins all the fun." "okay getting to the point Maka I dare you to..._Seduce Soul_." "okay." at that soul's head shot towards Maka out of disbelief, "I would like to see you try." Soul smirked. "Okay be right back." Maka grabbed her bag and left the room. When she came back no one could believe their eyes. Maka, was dressed in a low cut tank-top that stopped at her bellybutton. Her skirt had a little slit going down the side. Her leggings were gone. And her face Had alight coat of makeup, a little mascara, some blush and glitter, and also a little lip gloss. At the sight of her everyone's mouth dropped open.

"M-M-M-MAKA!" Soul stutter-yelled. "What can't a girl know how to look pretty?" With that Maka walked over to Soul and sat in his lap. _"Hey-Soul-ly"_ Maka purred while running her fingers through Soul's hair. Soul's entire face went red. All the sudden Maka's face starts getting closer to Souls. Soul lets his eyes slip closed. "Yeah I did it," Maka yells. She must have have noticed the disappointed look on Soul's face because the next thing she does was completely unnecessary, "Hey cheer up Soul." Then she licks soul's cheek. Maka climbs off of Soul's lap and says "Truth or Dare Tsubaki?" "Dare Please." Tsubaki says and then takes a shot of vodka mixed with coke."Okay Tsubaki, I dare you to give Blackstar a lap dance." Maka says evilly. As soon as Tsubaki climbs into Blackstar's lap he gets a nosebleed and passes out. "Well then someone's a little pervert." comments Liz.

They do this for a couple hours(Blackstar wakes up ten minutes later). All of them are buzzed except except Maka who is only Tipsy despite drinking the most.

"Okay Maka", Patty says, "I dare you to make out with Soul."

"k" Maka says. "Wait Maka NO." Soul Protests. Maka ignores him and shoves her tongue down his throat. Soon they're so into it they for get everyone else is still In the room.

"Umm, should we give them Some Privacy?" Tsubaki asks her face Beat red.

"Yeah, Come on everyone your God orders you to leave." Blackstar orders.

With that They left turning off the light.

**~Elswhere~**

Spirit suddenly had a heart attack. When he wakes up he yells to the world, "Soul Eater, I'm gonna kill you."

**So how was it? Comments? Suggestions?**


	3. Displaced Jealousy

**Hey, The next 2 parts of Drunk Maka will take place at a bar and will involve Death The Kid. I personally love Death the kid, but I had to do this. Please don't hate me too much...This part and the next part was a request by Whitelily1derful! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Soul Eater**

It's time to have some fun. I'm so evil I love it...my master plan will finally prove to everyone I'm not that sweet innocent little girl they always thought I was. If any thing I'm the complete opposite. what exactly is my master plan? Well lets just say I'm going to a bar. Time to initiate phase one. I walk into our living room and as always Soul is laying on the couch watching T.V.

I dial Kid's number and in a loud voice I know Soul will hear I Say, "Hey Kid, I was just wondering if you wanted to go to a bar with me tonight?...You will...Thanks, Pick me up at 8. Bye." When I hang up I notice Soul is looking at me, so I pretend that I didn't notice him until now. "Oh, Hey Soul, I guess you heard me talking to kid. You can order whatever you want for dinner tonight I won't be home."

_**~Time Skip~**_

I am now sitting at a bar with Death The Kid. Out of the corner of my eye I see Soul watching us. Perfect. He doesn't know that I know he followed us. I decide to take my plan up a notch. Yes, I am going to flirt with Death The Kid.

"Kid I am so glad you came with me tonight." I say and he says, "It was my pleasure." Dang Soul still hasn't reacted at all. "You know Kid I always thought that you were so, so, so _Sexy_. Really you're just so _Delectable..."_ I say this in a saucy voice while licking my lips and placing my hands on his chest. As I slowly start leaning in to kiss him a hand stops me. I turn around to see Soul. Looks like my plan worked. "What do you think you're doing, Maka?" Soul asks me. Instead of letting me answer he pulls me up and leads me to the dancefloor.

_With Death The Kid:_

"I'm so glad I agreed to this. Yumm, Those skinny jeans Soul is wearing are delicious...I've never been happier to be gay!"

_Back with Soul and Maka:_

"What do you think you're doing Soul. It's not like you'll ever like me so stay out of my love life." I fake pout. I've always been a great actor. "No Maka I can't stand seeing you with other guys...I can't like you because I love you..."

Needless to say Soul and Maka spent the rest of the night making out as well as other things.

**You gotta love a corny Soul!**


	4. What Soul Lost

**I can't get this out of my head so it will probably be shorter...Sorry!This chapter will be in Soul's P.O.V.**

**Disclaimer: I no own Soul Eater...I a threat to characters' safety. **

****"Your just a little freak, a little know-it-all freak. The only thing anyone will ever notice about you is you're a flat-chested bookworm! No-one will ever like you! The reason you hate sluts so much is because you want to be one but can't! So just shut-up Maka!" I yelled. As soon as I say the words I regret them. Maka just looks up at me with watery eyes and then whispers, "I hate you Soul, I really thought you were different, but I guess I was wrong..." and runs out the door crying.

I really hate myself right now...I can't even remember why I even got mad in the first place. I'm a horrible weapon...I going to go find her before she gets into trouble!

I run out the door and out of our apartment building. I to the library thinking that she would be there because she loves to read so much...Boy was I wrong!

Instead of Maka being there I find Patty. I try to back away slowly, but she's sees me before I can get away...She looks angry. She walks over to be and jack-slaps me. Then in her scary voice she says, "How. Dare. You. Say. Those. Mean. Things. To. Maka." Then she slaps me again.

"Ummm Patty, I gotta go!" I mumble and then I high-tail it out of there.

_Later on at Maka's and Soul's Apartment:_

"I can't believe I couldn't find her."

Suddenly I hear a giggle coming from the kitchen, I swiftly look in the kitchen and see Maka talking to someone on the phone.

"Sure Kid I would love to go out with you. You mean the bar off of 5th street. Sure I'll see you there. Bye!" She holds the phone to her chest smiling dreamily at the wall. "Oh Hey Soul, I'm going out tonight..." she says in a downcast voice when she turns and sees me standing here.

I nod and go and sit on the couch. When she comes out of her room I see her wearing really slutty clothes and before I can stop her from walking out the door she's gone.

I can't let her do this! I grab my black, leather jacket annd my motorcycle keys and i'm off.

When I get to the bar they're at I about lose my temper. Maka and Kid are sitting at the bar drinking.

And Maka is in his lap!

Finally I just Lose it,

"MAKA ALBARN WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!?"

She gets off Kid's lap and walks over to me and says in a sickly sweet voice,"Proving to you that I am lovable."

I let out a sigh, "Look Maka, I only say those things because I hate myself for loving you when you're my meister..."

Suddenly she jumps into my arms and her hands are in my hair kissing me. As soon as I start to kiss back she passes out. I look over at Kid to see him burning a wallet on the ground. I would hate to be the guy that wallet belongs to!

Something, then, dawns on me: I came her with a wallet. And now it's gone.

"MY WALLET!" I drop a drunk maka and proceed to cry over the loss of my beautiful wallet.

**There i finally finished this. sorry for the wait. I find it really hard trying to write a guy character's POV.**


	5. The Unexpected

Disclaimer: I no own soul eater and friends...

Maka Albarn was not a drinking kind of girl. She was very prim and proper. She never backtalked her professors. She walked with perfect posture. She never swore. She had excellent grammar. She was clean person, and did not tolerate a dirty anything. She used her manners with grace, and she had fine etiquette. Above all, though, she was responsible. To her this meant not doing drugs, not smoking, maintaing good health and hygiene, but most importantly, it meant no drinking. Needless to say, when her deathscythe Soul Eater Evans came home one day and found her naked on the kitchen table with seven empty bottles of vodka and her finishing off the last few drops of the eighth bottle, he was utterly surprised.

"Maka?" he all but shouted. At the mention of her name the ash blonde meister turned and greeted her weapon.

"Heeeeeeeey Soullly-kins!" she slurred, " what are you doing home so early?"

"Maka, it 's one o'clock in the morning. How am I home early?" he asked exasperated.

"Because silly, I just finished all of my vodka!" She sing-songed, "Watch me dance!"

With that being said Maka jumped up on the table and started dancing like an idiot. It was also at that moment that it occured to Soul that his meister, who he was secretly in love with was naked.

"Maka...Why atre you naked?" Soul questioned with a dark red blush covering his face.

"I'll tell you, but first you have you have to catch me!" She demanded smiling evilly.

"Alright." the red eyed weapon said hesitantly.

Maka's eyes instantly brightened with glee, and she leaped off the table and tackled him onto the floor. Cackling evilly she squeezed his nose as hard as she could and yelled, "Clown go HONK HONK!"

Soul was surprised she didn't break his nose, but then again she is drunk. As he was clutching his poor abused nose, Maka took this opportunity to dash into th bathroom and hide in the bathtub. Rolling his eyes, Soul stood up and followed her into the bathroom.

"Sooooul," She all but purred, "Won't you take a bath with me!"

Soul used this to his advantage, although he knows now that Blair is a extremely bad influence. "Of course I will Maka, but first you have to tell me why you were drinking so much vodka."

"Do I have tooooooooo" she pouted.

"Yes." Soul replied simply.

"Your stalker told me that it was a shame I was such a goody goody, because alcohol makes your boobs grow bigger. I sure proved her wrong didn't I...Soo...ul." The poor girl had fallen asleep before she could even finish her sentence.

Soul sighed and carried the insecure girl to his bed and passed out next to her.

The next morning Soul Eater Evans woke up to a Maka Chop and the blushing girl herself. He couldn't stop himself from thinking that he needed to thank his stalker since because of her he got to cuddle with the girl of his dreams.


End file.
